Dear Dorian,
I am proud of you. For a minute we were worried about you. We thought you’d never settle down and chill out. Thank God for the two A’s: Age and Axely. You have finally calmed down. We are a mixed-matched pair of siblings. You’re aggressive, I’m more passive-aggressive. You’re the oldest, and I’m the youngest. You’re a Lion, and I’m a Water Bearer (and astrologically, those signs are infect the exact opposites). You’re impatient and I have the patience of a saint. You’re more outgoing and charming, and I’m terribly shy. You’re good at talking while I opt to listen. You get my point. Together we had a very colorful childhood. Remember the nicknames they gave us when we were kids? Boo & Pepper, Axe & Smash, Boy & Nickel, The Devil & His Soul. Remember the times Ma would take us to play basketball and racquetball when it was just the three of us? Or all the trips to the library? I remember the story about the first time you saw me. When they brought me home from the hospital and put me in the crib, they said “Come here Dorian, look a your sister!” You looked into the crib and said “oooooh!” (in the same tone of voice one would say “I’m tellin’!” or “You’re in trouble!”). I also remember the story Ma told me of how I would throw my bottle down the stairs, and you’d run down to pick it up and bring it back to me. Then we’d repeat the process. I also remember the Christmas on South Street when I finally realized that Santa Claus wasn’t real, because it was the same Christmas you Duriel (and I think J.D) messed up my Baby Alive doll and made her pee green stuff. You always wanted video games & expensive shoes, and I only wanted everything Barbie.You were always concerned about your looks, and I never really cared. You had a ton of friends, and all of my friends went gaga over your looks. Everybody was tougher on you and sweeter on me (except for Ma & Dwayne of course). It seemed the natural way of things. We were Penny’s children, Dorian & Wilena. No one ever really forgets us.
We don’t see each other as much, which may or may not be a good thing. I know that it would make Ma a little happier if we were closer. And I should come to you more often for advice, or spend more time with you. I should basically embrace the benefits of having an older brother. But I choose not to interfere with your life. One, I don’t think I quite fit into it (which is fine), and also because I feel that it’s safer that way (which is also fine). There have been times when I’ve wanted to rip your head off because of your insensitive actions, and times when you would shock me with an act of kindness. I just hope that more people will be able to see the nicer side of you more often as we get older. You, like I, are growing and learning more about life with each passing year. But no matter what happens, you know I’m just a phone call away.
Love & Video Games,
Pepper/Smash/Nickel/Soul
or Wilena.
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